beauty, a bedside perspective

goldfinch

"Isn’t the whole point of things—beautiful things—that they connect you to some larger beauty?" Donna Tartt, The Goldfinch

This week, the whole of this week, I've been in bed. It's been a long time since I've been so sick. It happens every few years and when it does, I get completely wiped out. Aside from coughing and caring for a little one who has been sicker than me, I've pretty much been laying low.

Bania brushes
memory

As I've wandered the house, playing memory, stepping into a silent studio, or pouring homemade soup and green juice out of repurposed jars, I'm aware how moments like this, these down-weeks, are so rare in our busy lives. There is a silence and a softness that comes with being sick, a beauty, one that we don't often give ourselves otherwise. And although the break in a normal routine is rather disorienting, I also find this downtime oddly centering.

palm springs

At my retreat last weekend in Palm Springs, we talked about the motivation and beauty behind our goals. Learning to see what is underneath what we want. We looked at different areas of our life (work, wellness, relationships, spirituality, creativity) and described what we want to feel in those areas. Balanced, centered, joyful, organized, productive, connected, inspired, beautiful, mindful, badass. Instead of focusing only on the goal, what we want to achieve, we talked about how we can focus on the feeling that is behind the goal. How do you want to feel in your work? In your relationships? When you wake up? By focusing on the feeling that you want to feel when you achieve your goal, you are actually living your goal now. The goals are no longer in front of you, you are living your way into them everyday. The journey is the destination. This is how to see the beauty in the daily journey that is connecting you to your larger dreams.