yesterday i was cleaning my studio. i picked up a book by Louise Bourgeois and inside, written on a piece of paper i found this.

we are always waiting for the big event that will change our lives forever. not to make our lives a paradise, but to give us direction, to find our what our mission is, what is worth struggling for.

i made this note ten years ago, it's by Doug Aitken. 

i have been searching my whole life. it's funny to look back on things i've written ten or even

thirteen years ago

and think, wow, i was thinking, growing, and searching even back then. it's been a long road. 

i have conversations almost daily with people about living deeply, finding your passion, and taking steps to bring our dreams alive. much of the time it's me talking, because i by no means, have it figured out. i have been working on projects for years that are still not manifested. i am not completely where i want to be with my art. but this year i feel as if i have taken some major steps into action. it's rough, sometimes the path gets obscured, i have moments of doubt and feel like so many people are years ahead of me. but then i remember that it's not a race, it's not a destination. the big event that we are waiting for is simply clarity. clarity to give us direction, to move forward and be inspired.